"You never eat alone when you are an excellent eavesdropper."

I will now tell you about the situation that led me to start this blog and also post the status that, "You never eat alone when you are an excellent eavesdropper." So it was a Friday at work and all you need to know is that everything worked out so that I was left eating alone. I decided I still needed to get out and went to the coffee shop/restaurant about a mile away where my best friend is the general manager. I was frustrated that I was eating alone but I had a book so it would be what it would be. My friend asked me what I wanted to eat and I said, "Look - all I really want is french fries...y'all dont have french fries do you?" She said they didn't but that she could have them make some extra crispy hash browns and serve them with ketchup. So I went outside on the patio and sat at a table and quickly overheard three women talking - all eating their fresh salads and drinking water. 

  

I couldnt quite figure out how these women were related - one was in their late 20's, the other late 30's and the other late 40's. They weren't related, they weren't coworkers...I figure they were friends that get together occasionally or something. So anyways, they get on to this conversation of marriage. The oldest woman said that she couldnt believe she had been married to her husband for 7 years. "7 years!?" The youngest girl remarked, "Gosh - I cant believe you are 47...you look amazing." (She really did look amazing for 47 - more like 35.)  Anyways, then they embarked down this long conversation about how they just, "Were never one of those women that HAD to be married." This was a very interesting topic to my lone self sitting at a table eating an entire dinner plate of extra-crispy hash browns dipped in ketchup. What makes up one of those "women that HAVE to be married?"...(I think we all know the stereotype). I listened in closer to my salad-eating, water-drinking friends...The oldest chimed in, "My husband always talks about how desperate my sister is to get married...and she hasn't gotten married..." The thirty year old chimed in next, "It's like men can smell how desparate she is...I mean...I was happy to be with the guy I was with for about 8 years, but once we broke up it was fine...I didnt HAVE to be with someone...." 

Now this got my brain going...because I would initially lump myself in with the "women who HAVE to be married type." I listened in more...washing down my hash browns with lots of Diet Coke.  And then it hit me - wait a minute...I am an independent woman! I pay my bills, my rent, have a job that I enjoy going to in which I don't think I am a total failure at...and I have friends that I like to hangout with...I'm not the "HAVE to be married type." Then I realized that if I was never married I would never have children, a husband, an immediate family, possibly grandchildren someday...and THAT's when I started to think...OH MY GOSH I HAVE TO GET MARRIED!!!! This seemed to be a very alarming thought as "getting married" is not something to wake up one day and do...you can't make it happen, pray it into existence or train for it as you do a marathon...So I was on this downward thought spiral when something caught my eye...in fact 3 things caught my eye...and those three things were the GINORMOUS diamond rings on each of the women's ring fingers.  And that solved the problem for me...because it seems easy to sit around and talk about how you never were one of those women who had to be married when you in fact yourself....ARE married. I laughed at the irony and went on my way!

Post script: I am really happy with my life...I am hopeful to get married someday...and generally cant wait for it....however, I am genuinely happy with where I am....marriage is not promised but I think it may happen someday for me...and no it wont solve all of my problems or complete me magically. But I think it will be good.